Thursday, November 1, 2007

SLIP - Sobriety Loses Its Place

I broke my sobriety over the weekend. I wonder why I do this to myself when I know I'm better off without drinking. I suppose the final truth is that sometimes I still want to drink and while most often I find the strength not to, there are times when I give in. I won't dwell on it, but since this is a recovery blog, I'm compelled to honesty.

On another subject, my employer cut everyone's pay by 20% yesterday. With it, our hours are also cut so I'll be working a 4-day week starting next week. The paycut will be a burden, but I can tighten my belt and get through it. I'm actually glad for the extra day. I can attend a yoga class and I'll have more time for the new business so I'm looking on the bright side.

A week ago I was thriving, now I feel like I'm just getting through. Life. Choices. Time to surrender.


Journey Through Life said...

The positive and negatives always seem to intertwine together. Less money, more time. I know that one well.

My thoughts are with you through this rough patch. May your surrendering help you get through.


Angela said...

Thank you, Annie. You are so sweet.

jennifergg said...

Oh Angela. I hope the surrendering helps (I'm a HORRIBLE surrender-er, I'm a kicker and screamer! But it's true, being still with the moment is most often the best thing to do.)

And I'm actually happy about the hours cut! This could be a terrific opportunity!

Sherri said...

Oh, Angela, I'm sorry you slipped. But it seems that you've put it in perspective, so that's good. Doesn't make me like you any less. I hope it hasn't made YOU like you any less.

You've been reading my blog, so you know that I've been in a bad place for a while. I'm finally coming out of it. In a couple of months you'll probably look back on this time as the best thing that could have happened.

Angela said...

Thanks, Jennifer. And you're right, it could be a terrific opportunity.

Angela said...

Not likely, Sherri, but one can hope. :) So glad you're coming out of the funk. Glad we've gotten to be friends.

Sherri said...

Me too. :)

thailandchani said...

There's a reason why one of my favorite phrases is "if you choose wrong the first time, choose again."

So.. you choose again. :)

Olivia said...

Thank you for your example of honesty, Angela. I'm sorry for your slip, and glad you're continuing on. Blessings and love to you on your journey, Olivia

Kikipotamus said...

It's brave of you to share this with the world. That says a lot.

bella said...

After trying everything else the yes, the surrendering comes.
compelled to honesty - I admire this.
Thinking of you, letting you know that in my book it is ok to be exactly where you are, as you are.
Be Well.

lunarmusings said...

Your transperancy is enormously courageous. I honor you through this process.

I do believe that the road to recovery is intensely individual, and often times undermined by rigid rules on what its supposed to look like for everyone. From what little of you I have experienced here, it seems that you are appoaching each of your days with a practice of consciousness...

This is your practice. Your experiment, your life... there is no shame in that.

You honor us all with your Truth.