It is a Monday evening and I've been sober 25 days. Each day is a challenge and I find myself wishing I hadn't waited so long to stop drinking again. Looking back, it doesn't seem like I had that much choice, but I know I did. I'm trying hard not to beat myself up about it and I think it's actually an energy I can use to sustain my sobriety. I forgot that for me the most important thing, the first thing and sometimes the only thing, is to not drink. When you have alcoholism, sobriety is sobriety and everything else is everything else. I forgot that for a long time.
I seem to be getting back to my right mind. I'm glad there are meetings to attend, e-mail lists to particpate in and blogs to read. I'm grateful for all the hands that are reaching out for me.