Wellness Wednesday - The Soul's Companion

From The Soul's Companion by Tian Dayton, Ph.D.

Organic Life

I am biologically programmed for development. Just as a flower grows from a seed, blooms, wilts and returns to the earth. I, too, have a life cycle. Dust to dust, ashes to ashes, I will come and go, be born, bloom and die. I am organic. I eat from the earth - I am a part of it, dependent on it. This is why I will love the world, becaue this world into which I am born is my spiritual and physical home.


I come from and will return to this world.



In the laboratory we can see daily things that come into existence and then disappear, that pop into existence out of nowhere and then fade away. These are subatomic particles so it is all on a pretty small scale, but we can imagine that if we apply quantum physics to the universe as a whole, the entire thing, all the matter, energy and space could come into existence out of nowhere, spontaneously, as a gigantic quantum fluctuation . . . . . . Quantum physics' contribution is that of a universe that is not predetermined but an evolutionary pattern that is governed by probabilities, which creates a true openness.


Phil Davies



This will be my bow-out Wellness Wednesday post as well. I'm just not a stick-with-the-program kind of gal. I will, of course, continue to visit Lunar Musings and appreciate the opportunity to have participated.

I'd also like to say a fond hello to John Eaton whose blogging I miss very much and whose photo I stole for this post because I couldn't find that cool picture of The Soul's Companion that I used before.

My parents are in town from Georgia for a long weekend, but I'll be back early next week with that archetype post I promised.

Peace to all.

Wellness Wednesday - The Yoga Diaries

I was at Roberta's house Sunday night for dinner and I mentioned I was considering making a commitment to do yoga every day for 30 days. "Well", she said, "how about making a vow? A vow is so much deeper than a commitment really. Let's do it together." (You have to be really careful what you mention you're considering to Roberta.) Thus began our "vow" to do yoga every day for 30 days and to write to each other about our practice. Roberta's first installment was so beautiful I asked her if I could share it here. So I guess Roberta is my first guest blogger! Here is her first Yoga Diary installment:

Day 2 The Yoga Diaries - Two Yoginis Takin' it Deeper

Day 2 is actually our first "real day" of my experiment with dear yogini friend Angela--taking a VOW (not a "pact", not a "committment", but a VOW!) to do yoga every day for one month. And to share what we are discovering with each other as well of course being a great source of support and encouragement. As this notion arose two days ago, part of what was clear to us was that a vow is something sacred, and something you don't screw around with. Are you for real, or are you just playing around with trying eternally to get better! Interesting question and already a fascinating exploration. Our first day we were both in class with our wonderful teacher Debra, being inspired as usual. But today we were left to our own resources! So here's my report for this day:

Decided at some point that I would have an early evening practice of some sort. Started preparing thinking about something I read once in "Light on Yoga" about how it's advisable to bathe both before and after practice. A novel idea to us westerners. But I like the idea of purifying and cleansing the body as part of entering into a sacred event. Also felt it would feel good to wash the day away. So I took a lovely long bubble bath with Miracle Soap and an essential oil blend called "Tranquility"--lavender, balsam fir needle, patchouli, Roman chamomile, palmerosa, and geranium. Just reading the ingredients puts me into deep chill mode. Decided not to read as I often do in the bathroom and just relaxed and let the sounds of the new Shantala cd soothe my body and soul.

Dried off and dressed in my favorite yoga clothes and then suffered a brief glitch of not remembering where I'd put my yoga mat. But clarity of intention persevered and after a brief search I found it and spread it out in my bedroom.

My bedroom is currently in flux, as are a lot of parts of my house. Because of three beautiful thangkas on the wall, a lovely Saraswati statue, and a sufi wood painting from Morocco, the room has a nice feeling. But because it also has some absolutely huge electical cords required for remodeling as well as often has noisy toddlers or a crying baby in the room during the day, I realized tonight that I have withdrawn my energy from this room, mainly just sleeping there. Only very recently even vacuumed, dusted, and changed the sheets in this poor neglected area. So I began my practice by relaxing into being with Chenrisi, White Tara, and Green Tara who are the figures in the three thangkas. I began by looking closely but softly at all of the details, many of which I had never fully noticed or had forgotten about. Then I looked at the entire image again in a soft way. Then it spontaneously occurred to me to ask and open myself to the blessings that were available for the asking. I opened my arms by my sides and allowed myself to receive fully with no obstruction or no notion of the concept of "obstructions". No nada. So beautiful to fully receive. I then raised my hands high, bowed deeply, and moved on to the next being who was awaiting my visit. Enjoyed learning to sense in a more refined way these different but equally sublime healing energies. White Tara is interesting because in this thangka she is more of a tan color with numerous gold highlights and these amazing pink roses. Just lush. The richness and fullness of Chenresi always bowls me over. And Green Tara is so dark, primal, mysterious, and eternally flowing and giving. A real babe of the deep jungle. Like Kali. And finally I came to the sufi painting I'd purchased in Morocco in 1967 on an early adventure with a girl friend. This painting may be the only thing besides my violin I've managed to hold onto after a life of so many years of moving A LOT. Moving houses, apartments, moving to new parts of the same town many times, changing housemates, husbands and lovers quite a lot. So the stuff has literally been flying all over the place. But this painting has been with me through three different spiritual communities, gracing so many houses and spaces I've lived in. And even though I "liked" it, it was always a bit of an enigma to me --"some kind of sufi thing". Tonight I relaxed gently into the concentric intricately decorated circles, noticing a couple of grease stains. I couldn't remember whether they came with it when I bought it. I slowly became aware of subtle gradations of coloration and a slight pulsating motion, drawing me deeper into the Heart at the core. I suddenly knew that this "thing" which I'd pondered and speculated about over the hearts, is nothing less than a crystallized transmission of Love, waiting patiently for the beholder who looks on it with love to bring it into Life and "activate" it.

So this, my dear yogini buddy, was the Beginning of Practice tonight! Oh my goodness. I actually had the thought that this could also be the end of my practice for today, as our "guidelines" mercifully allow a lot of leeway for what it is to consciously "practice yoga". I was already feeling that nothing was lacking. But my space was by this time feeling so energized and divinized that I was curious to discover what I might further experience. When I sat down I was immediately aware of beginning to breathe more deeply and regularly and continuing to remain open to all these blessings raining down. I didn't even think to do the Invocation we usually do as it seemed like it had already happened. I started doing some gentle neck stretches and spinal movements, loosening up what I was immediately aware was speaking to me. Then I even remembered to change the cross of my legs as Debra has been having us do recently. Noticed how I have been "resenting" this intrusion on my "habit" but that tonight it seemed just interesting. Then moved into child's pose. Thought briefly about how much I was enjoying this chance to "experiment" a bit. Why do we always or at least very often begin with child's pose? Well, it seems because it is such a great gentle hip opener as well as a simultaneous great spine stretch. A great prep for Down Dog. Am feeling that at long last I am on the verge of begninning to inhabit Down Dog. Gosh, a breakthrough! This is because recently Debra made it clear that not only is it way overdue for me to get my shoulders open (instead of "working at it" for years and years!), but that the essential muscles and knowledge is actually already in the program. She showed me exactly where it is in fact recently, and this was so brilliant. Now instead of constantly haranguing myself about how I Should Do More Shoulder Openers, I can just simply open them. Hallelujah! So after my best and fullest expression of Down Dog (at this point in time and space)then I moved to pigeon (your favorite!) which I experienced so beautifully and deeply tonight. I really like this one. Then back to down dog, lowering down pretty gracefully into cobra which I also enjoy so much, especially with the arms out to the side so you can really get "the trench". Then slowly up via Fierce Pose which I am also finding to be powerfully energizing as of late. Stood in relaxed but impeccable Standing Pose breathing deeply and smoothly for a while. Sat down thinking I might do some more asanas, but then thought "No, more is not necessarily better. I am not competing with anyone, not even myself or my past selves". Now that is a relief! It was tantamount to myself and everyone else in the room (Green Tara, White Tara, Chenresi, and the unnamed Sufi) that the next best move was sivasana! But before I got into this I brought my awareness into having an "arch" in my lower back, shoulders back and heart up and shining. Then some moments of letting it all go into timeless and spaceless mode. But still so energized and alive that when the notion of "The Yoga Diaries" flitted into my brain I had to gently rise from this excellent session and tell you all about it.

I was sure from the get go that this Vow was a good idea. But it's way better than I'd imagined (as of course, everything always is!) So no expectation, no programs, no agendas, no plans. Just show up and see what's happening. Thank you so much for being the generator of this enjoyable and instructive experiment,girlfriend!

With love and comradeship in endless exploration--

Roberta

Wellness Wednesday - Beliefs

I met with the woman who's going to guide me through the process I mentioned in a previous post on Monday night. We spent three hours examining the beliefs that I've carried into my adult life, unexamined, from growing up in the south and in my family of origin. Some of them seemed really silly for me to even write. I felt like I'd left them long behind, but the truth is that when we began discussing them and how they'd manifested in my life, I began to realize I only thought I'd left them behind. Just to give you an idea, here are a few of the ones I listed:

Women are neurotic and hard to manage.

Money is scarce.

People are not to be trusted unless they're a member of the family or a person in authority - a doctor, judge, lawyer or the president, etc. Those people are to be trusted implicitly and with no questioning.

Your needs are not important, as a matter of fact you really don't have any.

Squash the symptom.

I had 33 of these written down and I'm sure I've barely scratched the surface. A couple of amazing things happened for me. The first was that as we were discussing these things I literally felt movement start up in my first chakra, the chakra of survival instincts, grounding and our connection to our bodies and the physical plane. It felt as though speaking these beliefs, letting them out, literally freed up energy that had been stuck there.

The second thing that happened is that I began to notice patterns. Patterns in the beliefs and correlations in patterns to the experiences I've had in my life. I believe this is what the 4th Step in AA is intended to do, but I never found the patterns by examaning my resentments, fears or sexual conduct. Obviously, other people do, but I didn't.

I was literally exhausted when I got home. I think this is going to be a profound healing process and will contribute to my overall wellness in ways I can only imagine. Thank you for sharing this journey with me.

Wellness Wednesday - Yoga

OK, I have to admit, I was meandering through all the posts and comments of the last few days - trying to let it all sink in - and I realized, Holy Cow!, it's Wellness Wednesday! And I'm part of that.

I haven't written much about my yoga practice, but it's an important part of my wellness program. We have the most incredible teacher here in Polson. Debra believes in adhering to the spriritual principles of yoga as well as the physical. So we always have a teaching up on the board and we always chant to begin and end each practice.

Although my budget has been diminished dramatically in recent weeks, I made the decision to purchase a 5-class package and a new mat (Kisster chewed up the old one) while I still had one full paycheck coming. I feel this was an investment in my wellness over the coming weeks. The more time I spend on my mat (and you gotta have one to spend time on it), the more I will be contributing to my overall mental and physical health. I could've gone to Wal-Mart and bought a cheap mat, but I chose to really invest in my yoga practice. It's something I love, something I'm committed to, and something that is a real benefit to my life. So, I bought the "Transformer Mat" and absolutely pranayama'd into the investment.

Besides the physical, spiritual and mental benefits of yoga, it's also a chance to connect with other people of like mind. When I went Monday, after having been away for several weeks, I was greeted with so much love and welcome, that it nearly brought tears to my eyes. Then Debra started working us and all I could think of was the practice.

Oh baby, it takes a village

Figured I'd get my Wellness Wednesday post done early today. I want to talk about the importance of community in sobriety and in life. I'm so mindful lately of the village that surrounds me, supports me and helps me persist in creating the life I want to create. I'm a participant in a number of communities, both formal and informal. My formal communities include a yoga community, business communities, an artist's community, the AA community, a writer's community, the LSR community, and now a blogging community. All of these are important to me, but it's the informal community that I've created around myself that really sustains and supports me, that keeps me going when I don't feel like it anymore and that I fall back on again and again for inspiration and love. My informal community consists of a handful of people that I connect with on a deep level, that I can speak with about anything and that share a commitment to the same values that I hold dear. It consists of an ex-lover, a neighbor/spiritual mentor/friend/buddy, a couple of AA women and my family. I keep these people tightly woven around me so I don't fall too hard.

I especially want to speak about the AA community I'm involved with because it's probably the most difficult for me. Now, many in AA will argue with you 'til the cows come home that it's not Christian-based, it's not fundamental, dogmatic or rigid. I disagree on all points. I've been around it and around it and I've even wanted to change my mind about it, but it hasn't happened. Here's the thing, though. It's the only sober-based face to face community available. Which brings me to one of my favorite subjects: choice. It's sad to me that there aren't more choices. It's sad to me that people go to AA and if it doesn't work for them, they often leave feeling there's something wrong with them. It's sad to me that the majority of people who use AA to good advantage also believe there's something wrong with those people, that they're either not "working the program" or they're "constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves". I've built up a strong backbone for sticking to my own beliefs, but the peer pressure in AA is as intense as any I've ever seen and most people that go there for the first time are in an extremely weak and vulnerable state. The saddest part, and one I know from first hand experience? People will go back and go back and go back and try it again and again, because it's the only thing out there. I would like to propose, if you're one of those people, that you go if you want to, take what you need and leave the rest. That's one of the principles too, you know. Use it.

I really didn't intend to go there when I first began this post, but I must've needed to. My primary point is that village, community, whatever you want to call it, is one of the finest things in my life. I'm really, really glad it takes a village. Thanks for being part of mine.

Meditation

Meditation has been an important part of my sobriety and spiritual practice for a long time. I remember the first time I went to a group meditation session - I thought I was going to jump out of my skin before it was over!

But I persevered, and gradually came to embrace the time to quiet my mind and sit with no distractions, no reaching or grabbing, no needing to have. I've read many, many books on meditation that I've found helpful. I think "Emotional Alchemy" by Tara Bennett-Goleman was one of the most profound reads for me on using meditation as a way to heal emotional wounds. Also, "Coming to Our Senses" by Jon Kabat-Zinn was a powerful book about the importance of mindfulness in creating a life of peace and joy. I've come to believe that learning to detach from my mind and all it's silly games is of real importance in gaining perspective on life and god(dess)and what the heck we're doing here. As long as I'm trapped in dualistic thinking, not realizing there is a way out of it, I'm probably not going to be very free or happy in this life. Once I got a taste of separating from me, and connecting with everything, I was hooked. So, this is my Wellness Wednesday post, on Thursday. I try, people.

All Natural Cure for Restless Legs Syndrome

I don't know when I've been so glad to get home, get in my fleece and get comfortable. My sleep has been poor lately, interrupted by a sore shoulder, the lovely and ever-soaking menopausal night sweats and a headful of information on starting a new business. But one thing that won't be keeping me up tonight is RLS, Restless Legs Syndrome. This particularly nasty little syndrome will let you get nice and relaxed before causing your legs to begin thrusting like a junkie's coming off smack (or so I've heard). I suffered with RLS for a few years, trying mutliple remedies that seemed to help, but never quite got rid of it. I tried hoemopathic remedies, supplements, exercise and acupuncture. I remember hearing about the new pharmaceutical, Requip, that could help provide relief, but the price was a possible problem with gambling and sex addiction. Thanks anyway. Then a friend of mine, The Practical Vampire Slayer as a matter of fact, (she has an excellent new post up by the way) told me how she had cured hers with a liquid calcium supplement. I was pretty skeptical at this point, but the RLS had become so bothersome that I really would try anything I hadn't already, except the Requip. After a week of night-time doses of Nature's Life liquid calcium, magnesium & phosphorous liquid, my RLS disappeared. Since then, 2-3 doses a week seems to do the trick to keep away the jittery legs.

One thing I really love about the blogging community is the free and reciprocal sharing of information. When I originally began this blog, I wanted to focus partly on some of the physical problems that tend to plague people, especially women, in recovery and treatments I've found helpful. I got a little sidetracked and then my new blogging friend, the lovely Elena of Lunar Musings started the Wellness Wednesday project and provided me the perfect opportunity to get back on track.

I can't guarantee this cure for you, but it worked for the PVS and it worked for me. If you're having a problem with RLS, I hope it works for you, too.